


It's OK to ask

by CockAsInTheBird



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Crying, Fluff, M/M, Touch-Starved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:53:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24977983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CockAsInTheBird/pseuds/CockAsInTheBird
Summary: To ask for anything has never come naturally to Billy, yet asking for something as simple as a hug shouldn't be this hard, right?
Relationships: Billy Hargrove & Steve Harrington, Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington
Comments: 15
Kudos: 216





	It's OK to ask

**Author's Note:**

> Another anonymous request! This time for some touch starved Billy shyly asking for affection

Girls, women, _bitches_ of all ages twist and turn to stare as the crowd parts for him, his broad shoulders, golden curls, bulging biceps, the perfect lifeguard, and maybe he'd come rescue you if you fell in the fountain? Wouldn't it at least be worth a shot? Ruin your perm, let your make-up run, soak your shirt.

Billy pushes his aviators further up his nose, up to cover those perfect baby blues, and gives a slight nod in the direction of a band of blushing girls, and they _visibly squirm_ under his gaze - _it's all too easy for him_. And through the front doors to Scoops Ahoy walks a gaggle of blondes, who all play with their hair as he walks past them with a gravely “ _Hi._ ”

Behind the counter stands Steve Harrington, staring and groaning with aggravation at how _easy_ it is for Billy, how nonchalant and endlessly charming he is, whilst Steve himself struggles painfully, as is proved by the score board Robin has sitting out in the back.

And with the same tone and spellbinding allure, Billy Hargrove stops in front of where Steve is slumped over the counter in defeat, purring out, “Hey Harrington.”

“ _Hargrove_ ,” Steve says with feigned irritation, and it's far too apparent in the way the corners of his lips quirk up.

Billy licks his lips and pushes his sunglasses further up again. “When's your break?” He looks around the shop in an attempt to not stare at those doe eyes.

“Not for another two hours,” Steve sighs and thumbs up at the clock that points at 1:07pm.

“Well I need to talk to you,” Billy's voice wavers for a short second, and he places both of his hands on the table between them. A thumb grazes against Steve's pinkie. “It's kinda important.”

He hears how Steve sucks in a quick breath of air, and moves his little finger into the touch. Watches as he stands up straight and moves to knock loudly on the glass partition, where it takes less than a second for Robin to pull it aside from inside the backroom. She's sitting on the metal counter there and audibly groans as she takes off her headset.

“ _What?_ ”

“I need to take a break.”

“Steve,” she says in a near accusatory tone.

“ _Robin_ ,” he responds with in a more serious tone, and tries to subtly nod toward Billy, standing with his arms crossed and looking around, pretending not to notice how the two are whispering.

And she rolls her eyes, climbs out through the window and throws her Walkman aside. “ _Fine_ , but you're doing cleanup tonight,” she grumbles and points sternly at him.

“Yeah yeah,” Steve moans and tears off his hat.

He moves to push open the swinging door to the back, and gestures for Billy to follow along.

“So, what's up?”

Billy moves against the table in the middle of the room, and his rings clink against it as he leans and grabs at the edges of it. “Could you...” he asks, almost shyly so, and nods towards the open partition.

“Oh... of course...” there's something to Steve's tone; hesitation? Maybe subdued elation? Never the less, it quivers with _something expectant_.

Robin stares at him, arms crossed and eyes sharp, as the frosted glass separates them in one smooth glide.

And now they're as alone as they can be on a busy Saturday afternoon, Billy and Steve, in the air conditioned backroom of the ice cream parlor, quiet for now as Billy continues hiding behind dark glasses.

“Billy...” there's a clear concern in his voice this time, and he moves to stand next to the other. “What's wrong?”

Usually when he comes to visit, it's to _try out today's specialty_ , as he so charmingly puts it and then just _takes whatever he wants_ , but he seems so _uncharacteristically shy now._

But he doesn't say a word, turns his head far away enough so that Steve can't see his rather nervous expression. Yet he reaches out with his little finger to graze against Steve's own pinkie.

Steve watches the slight movement and goes to meet it, carefully inches his hand closer as if to tell Billy that whatever is wrong will be ok. Then Billy dares, moves his entire hand on top of the paler one and entangles their fingers where they bend around the edge of the table.

“Is it... about your dad?” Steve asks as kindly as he can, and lifts his head up to look at the back of Billy's.

Who shakes out a _no_.

“Are you having more nightmares?”

The curls dance again.

“Max?”

The answer is the same.

And Steve sighs; unsure of the intent behind it himself, but it isn't irritated or impatient. “Well, whatever it is, I'm here for you, you know that... right?”

Billy nods and turns his head slightly.

“If you ever need anything, you have a key to my place. There's always room for you there.” Steve looks down as the hand on top of his squeezes in appreciation. “We can stay like this for a while, if that's what you need.”

“I...” Billy tries and looks down at where their fingers have been laced together, pale and tan, calloused and soft.

_Feelings_ never comes easy to Billy, even if he and Steve have been “practicing” it for a while now. Or rather, Steve, the loving goof who is all too open about everything, has been practically _forcing_ Billy to talk about his day and feelings and “Use your words, baby,” as if he's a child. But... it's been _so nice_ , almost _too nice_ , _unrealistically so_ , to an extend that Billy never imagined possible for himself.

And whenever he's not his usual meat-headed self, when he's inexplicably vulnerable, all those thoughts are more than just voices in the back of his head. They're _loud_ and _blinding_ , and he suffocates on it. It's what was portrayed as anger and fury back in high school, and now it's teary and itching and _craving_.

He's been shown _love_ , and it is _addicting_.

“I... I want... I need...”

Steve watches how that mouth _struggles_ , almost grimacing as if he's just tasted something putrid. But he remains patient.

“Can you hug me? Just... just hug me?” Billy asks timidly as if what he wants is _unreasonably expensive_.

And it comes as a shock, which is clear in the way Steve's mouth opens slightly and his brows jerk up. Because Billy rarely asks for this... this... this kind of _gentle affection_. Billy is teeth and spit and muscle, but he's also a broken heart, and that shines through sometimes; like the sun after a thunderstorm. And even though he complains about “working on his emotions and all that shit”, it's _helping_.

“Yeah...” Steve utters and stands up, “Of course... come here.”

Billy shoots up immediately and throws his arms _tightly_ around Steve, whose own arms close around shoulders exposed by the tank top, one hand closing in the shirt, the other nestled in soft curls.

He holds him dearly; caresses the back of Billy's head lovingly, and feels in their embrace how much Billy _needed this_. Arms that grips him like there's nothing more important, a nose pushing aside the stupid sailor uniform to bury itself in the crook of his neck, where he feels Billy take a deep, long inhale, like someone would a flower or freshly baked bread.

Who knows how long they stand like that; Steve brushing his fingers through Billy's hair, leaning his head on top, bodies so flush they share heat and heart, and _it is amazing_.

_Steve feels loved._

_Billy feels loved._

And although he doesn't let go, Billy eases up his iron clasp, and Steve takes it as a sign that he can move as well, to then lean slightly away. Touch as soft as silk, he cups Billy's face in his hands, feels how Billy melts into it; head tilting to the side and resting in the gentle hold, lips parting to breathe out unexpected relief, as if all the tension and frustration that kept his body standing just vanishes at a lovers touch.

“Can I...” Steve guides his fingers up to touch the temples of the sunglasses.

“ _Yeah..._ ” Billy's voice a fragile little thing, his nod barely noticeable.

Carefully so, as if the world would shatter if he moved too quickly, Steve pulls off the aviators, folds them together and sets them down on the table. After which his hands goes right back to hold and cherish Billy's strong jaw and weak expression, finally meeting eyes bluer than the sky, shiny and wet, just in the verge of a single tear to fall.

When he rubs at Billy's cheek with his thumb, he feels the hands by the small of his back clench tighter around his uniform, and watches how Billy closes his eyes, letting that one tear roll down, accompanied with a sob.

He swipes away that drop of pain and leans in to kiss between bangs, hoping that his loving thoughts and intentions can be felt there; hopes that it seeps through the clouds of doubt and sorrow and melancholy in Billy's mind to remind him that he is wanted in life- _in Steve's life_.

But just in case it isn't clear enough, he presses their foreheads together, and whispers,

“You know I love you, right?”

And Billy can barely find the power to hold back another sob, louder now as it escapes with a broken “ _fuck_.”

He then nods and snivels, letting out a little “ _yes_ ,” and although he doesn't have the energy to say it back, he understands well that Steve _knows he loves him too_.

How else would Billy be able to exist in such a raw state as this, in front of someone else, pained to be vulnerable, grateful to be held, if it's not a love declaration in of itself?

“Let's go, yeah? I'll take off from work and we can sneak out the back here, meet back at mine and watch a movie or something.”

Billy has to choke back another cry of appreciation, and a smile spreads wide, “ _Yeah._ ”

**Author's Note:**

> If you have any requests or suggestions you can find me on tumblr as CockAsInTheBird! (Shocker hahaha)


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